I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
