So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
