friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize