The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
