Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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