I need help removing her.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize