I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
and she was petting her beer can
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
