She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize