He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
