I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize