I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
