he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
