this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
