So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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