I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
