I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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