if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Did I show you my penis last night?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
