Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
