They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
