Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
