So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
