she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
another moral hangover. fuck.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
