It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
