The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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