I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
