Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
