In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
