Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
