Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
