these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
