And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
