3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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