its not stalking. its research.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
