I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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