i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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