Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
