ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
