Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Welp...herpes.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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