wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
