dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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