His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Randomize
