Dual....:-)
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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