I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
