Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?

(313): View more from Michigan

No?

(586): View more from Michigan

Well my cheeks are red now

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(619): View more from California

i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out

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(231): View more from Michigan

i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget

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(410): View more from Maryland

He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.

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(251): View more from Alabama

As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"

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(361): View more from Texas

She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.

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(785): View more from Kansas

Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life

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(315): View more from New York

I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way

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