If i come over, it means nothing
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
foreskin is a definite game changer
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
