If i come over, it means nothing
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
