Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
