There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
