I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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