I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Pants are for mortals
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
