he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
