I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize