you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
